Wanted: One Husband

I haven't spoken to my husband properly in 11 days.

You see I am no longer the favourite thing in his life. On Sunday 14th August, he found and promptly fell in love with another.

His ipad 2.

Steve with the Homewrecker

Since then it is all he does, all he lives, eats and sleeps. He took it into the kitchen the other night to read an online recipe from, he takes it to bed to get live sports results, he hugs it protectively, much like I'd imagine a protective new mother to do with her new offspring.

It would be quite touching apart from the fact that our communication is getting to email level. Today, on arriving home from work, he was ecstatic to demonstrate the new wireless keyboard (why, why? I mean, I thought the whole point of the ipad was that it was small and compact and did not need a keyboard?), said demonstration involved me holding the ipad ('Careful Liv! It's not a toy!') while he sat at the other side of the room typing away a message to me that appeared on the screen in front of me - fab, a new way of talking to me!

So Steve, as you are reading this on your shiney new ipad 2 (nope, I am not calling it by name....), a message:

My love, I'm going to bed, if you get your act together quickly then you might even be in for some.

Got your attention?