Steve is reading the paper.
After laughing at the majority of the headlines, he comes to the personals.
"Shy female seeks experienced males"
He pauses.
"Well she can't be that shy if she's decided to put it in the paper."
Sunday, 22 August 2010
Friday, 13 August 2010
The weekend
First of all, can I say a big thank you to you all for the support I got after Wednesday's post. A-M-A-Z-I-N-G. Seriously, it was so lovely to hear all your kind words and did give me that extra bit of strength and reassurance to know that I would be fine. Oh and Steve has asked me to tell you all that the upsetting issue was nothing to do with him, apparently I made it sound like I'd caught him with a hooker or something. Not the case. Steve is all good. Just so we're clear (acceptable Mr?).
Anyway, today is Friday, all is right in the world again and I am venturing to London tomorrow to see my fire girls for the first post blaze reunion and also to try on the bridesmaid dresses! Ooooohs all around please!
I'll do a post tomorrow about plumbers (mainly because mine has pissed me off) but, as a Friday question, I would like to know two things:
1) What one BRILLIANT BEYOND AMAZING THING you are doing this weekend?
and
2) Whether I should treat myself to a teensy glass of wine tonight, diet be damned?
x
ps Two of my lovely commenters (that I know of) are in the Rock My Wedding's Find a New Jenny competition - good luck ladies! x
Anyway, today is Friday, all is right in the world again and I am venturing to London tomorrow to see my fire girls for the first post blaze reunion and also to try on the bridesmaid dresses! Ooooohs all around please!
I'll do a post tomorrow about plumbers (mainly because mine has pissed me off) but, as a Friday question, I would like to know two things:
1) What one BRILLIANT BEYOND AMAZING THING you are doing this weekend?
and
2) Whether I should treat myself to a teensy glass of wine tonight, diet be damned?
x
ps Two of my lovely commenters (that I know of) are in the Rock My Wedding's Find a New Jenny competition - good luck ladies! x
Wednesday, 11 August 2010
Sinking fast (but hopefully bobbing up like one of those buoy things within a day or so)
Today life is pretty rubbish.
I am generally struggling this week, partly because I just am (please tell me you sometimes have weeks like this?) and partly because it is the one year anniversary (totally the wrong phrase) of something tomorrow. Something that I found out, that impossibly changed nothing but also everything and that I am partly still dealing with and struggling with, even though I have been told by several people that I 'should be over it by now'.
But it is never that simple is it.
And, being the chronic over analyser that I am, I am second guessing myself. Should I have dealt with this by now? Should I be over it? Should it have ever mattered in the first place (as one person told me)? Am I being self indulgent?
And that's just the simple, one layer analysis.
Go a level deeper and there's more. Third guessing if you will. If I am being self indulgent then isn't it technically my right to do so as it is my issue? Can I force myself to be over something when I know deep down I'm not? What right have others to tell me how I should feel?
And fourth guessing, another level further.... What if I am being so self indulgent that I don't see it for what it is and that others are right and that in fact I should be over it? What if by allowing myself to think these things I am stopping myself from dealing with it all correctly? What if those people who are lecturing me and telling how to feel are only doing so because they know more than me about this and are only doing what is best?
There are several deeper, uglier and more confusing levels that I can, and often do, go to to analyse and think on but by telling you those you are likely to become so confused and be sure that I am, in fact, an insane Livy, trapped in the currently not so fun Livy world and believe that I should be labotomised immediately.
Instead I will tell you that, rather than remain calm and just get the hell on with it, I instead decided to fall off the healthy eating band wagon and purchase a sausage and cheese panini.
Doesn't sound nice does it?
It wasn't.
But I ate it anyway. And then felt sick and now feel angrier still at myself.
So, here is the new plan.
Get through today, head down, work hard, go home, try and sleep without any form of nightmares (which is the classic Stressed Livy symptom)
Minds are silly things aren't they? So here is a picture of me, younger and far more stress free (apart from five minutes later when I fell off...).
Hoping to be back with you soon, but sane and fun and much less sucky. x
I am generally struggling this week, partly because I just am (please tell me you sometimes have weeks like this?) and partly because it is the one year anniversary (totally the wrong phrase) of something tomorrow. Something that I found out, that impossibly changed nothing but also everything and that I am partly still dealing with and struggling with, even though I have been told by several people that I 'should be over it by now'.
But it is never that simple is it.
And, being the chronic over analyser that I am, I am second guessing myself. Should I have dealt with this by now? Should I be over it? Should it have ever mattered in the first place (as one person told me)? Am I being self indulgent?
And that's just the simple, one layer analysis.
Go a level deeper and there's more. Third guessing if you will. If I am being self indulgent then isn't it technically my right to do so as it is my issue? Can I force myself to be over something when I know deep down I'm not? What right have others to tell me how I should feel?
And fourth guessing, another level further.... What if I am being so self indulgent that I don't see it for what it is and that others are right and that in fact I should be over it? What if by allowing myself to think these things I am stopping myself from dealing with it all correctly? What if those people who are lecturing me and telling how to feel are only doing so because they know more than me about this and are only doing what is best?
There are several deeper, uglier and more confusing levels that I can, and often do, go to to analyse and think on but by telling you those you are likely to become so confused and be sure that I am, in fact, an insane Livy, trapped in the currently not so fun Livy world and believe that I should be labotomised immediately.
Instead I will tell you that, rather than remain calm and just get the hell on with it, I instead decided to fall off the healthy eating band wagon and purchase a sausage and cheese panini.
Doesn't sound nice does it?
It wasn't.
But I ate it anyway. And then felt sick and now feel angrier still at myself.
So, here is the new plan.
Get through today, head down, work hard, go home, try and sleep without any form of nightmares (which is the classic Stressed Livy symptom)
- Tomorrow, wake up, ideally from a lovely night's sleep, more likely tired and stressed, get through the day again, head down, work hard, go home, look forward to sleep and sleep
- Friday, I WILL FEEL BETTER. The day will be over and it is a new year start.
Minds are silly things aren't they? So here is a picture of me, younger and far more stress free (apart from five minutes later when I fell off...).
Hoping to be back with you soon, but sane and fun and much less sucky. x
Sunday, 8 August 2010
He's nearly as famous as me
Why is it that whenever I shave my legs I seem to miss my knees? I mean, how is this possible? They are in the middle of my legs
In fact, I remember shaving them each time. Perhaps my knee hair is somehow razor resistant? Or that it just grows like super super fast!
Oooooh, I forgot, anyone watching Pete Versus Life on Channel 4?
Secondly, remember Lola my lovely sister? Her boyfriend is in it.
Yep, my potential brother in law (prother-in-law if you will) is playing Jake.
And he rocks.
Livy out x
In fact, I remember shaving them each time. Perhaps my knee hair is somehow razor resistant? Or that it just grows like super super fast!
Oooooh, I forgot, anyone watching Pete Versus Life on Channel 4?You should.
Firstly, it is awesome.
Yep, my potential brother in law (prother-in-law if you will) is playing Jake.
And he rocks.
Livy out x
Saturday, 7 August 2010
Will the Real Livy please stand up
I have been ill.
Like properly, yuckingly ill.
On Wednesday night I felt a bit wrong, then by midnight I felt a lot wrong and by 3am I was throwing up. Muchos.
It was horrific, I was convinced I was dying and, throughout, the thing that upset me most wasn't the fact I was sure I was about to die.
No.
It was the wedding. We've got it all booked and sorted, I mean, what a waste of money if I went and died.
So I did what any sensible girl would do and decided to find Steve a replacement fiancee he could marry next February instead.
This obviously was a big undertaking and I made my mind up straight away that it would need to be someone I knew and what would be more perfect than one of my bridesmaids?
I ran them all past Steve.
Me: OK, so there's Alex, my sister. Would that be weird?
Steve: This conversation is getting weird.
Me: Fine. Ummm.. Katie is so great and you too have loads in common, I mean, both your Grandmas are called Ivy!
Steve: Both are Grandmas are called Ivy because they are the same Grandma. We are cousins.
Me: That's legal!
Steve gives me a look of pure 'move on'
Me: OK, well Cadi's out as she is only 6.....
Back to my computer looking at photos of various friends...
Me: So that leaves Kazzie, Julia and Laura. Now Laura is so creative and fun and makes the best apple pancakes but she has been known to ask the waiter to pick her food and you get mad at me when I ask only your opinion, let alone the waiter..... Kazzie is the best and works in a publishing agency so would probably get you free books and she can belly dance, oh, but she works in London so it'd have to be long distance. Julia is great and the closest location wise, and neither of you like peas plus she would be a good mummy to our fish... but wait, a lot of her fish have died... maybe my fish babies wouldn't be safe.
I look up. Steve has gone.
Tired, I close my eyes and the next thing I know it is the next day and I feel better. I am not going to die!
I am relieved, not only that my impending death has been postponed but also because finding a replacement me turns out to be a bugger.
Like properly, yuckingly ill.
On Wednesday night I felt a bit wrong, then by midnight I felt a lot wrong and by 3am I was throwing up. Muchos.
It was horrific, I was convinced I was dying and, throughout, the thing that upset me most wasn't the fact I was sure I was about to die.
No.
It was the wedding. We've got it all booked and sorted, I mean, what a waste of money if I went and died.
So I did what any sensible girl would do and decided to find Steve a replacement fiancee he could marry next February instead.
This obviously was a big undertaking and I made my mind up straight away that it would need to be someone I knew and what would be more perfect than one of my bridesmaids?
I ran them all past Steve.
Me: OK, so there's Alex, my sister. Would that be weird?
Steve: This conversation is getting weird.
Me: Fine. Ummm.. Katie is so great and you too have loads in common, I mean, both your Grandmas are called Ivy!
Steve: Both are Grandmas are called Ivy because they are the same Grandma. We are cousins.
Me: That's legal!
Steve gives me a look of pure 'move on'
Me: OK, well Cadi's out as she is only 6.....
Back to my computer looking at photos of various friends...
Me: So that leaves Kazzie, Julia and Laura. Now Laura is so creative and fun and makes the best apple pancakes but she has been known to ask the waiter to pick her food and you get mad at me when I ask only your opinion, let alone the waiter..... Kazzie is the best and works in a publishing agency so would probably get you free books and she can belly dance, oh, but she works in London so it'd have to be long distance. Julia is great and the closest location wise, and neither of you like peas plus she would be a good mummy to our fish... but wait, a lot of her fish have died... maybe my fish babies wouldn't be safe.
I look up. Steve has gone.
Tired, I close my eyes and the next thing I know it is the next day and I feel better. I am not going to die!
I am relieved, not only that my impending death has been postponed but also because finding a replacement me turns out to be a bugger.
Tuesday, 3 August 2010
Ever resourceful
You know how generally your fingers are slightly thinner in the winter than in the summer?
You do?
Great.
Now forget it as I, ever the freak, seem to have it in reverse.
Yep, my ring was slightly tighter when we first got engaged back in October, I never worried about it coming off. Ever.
Until now.
Recently, it seems looser, more twisty and generally more 'I-could-randomly-leap-off-your-finger-at-any-moment'.
I tied floss snugly around my finger and popped the ring on top.
At least I hope they haven't......
You do?
Great.
Now forget it as I, ever the freak, seem to have it in reverse.
Yep, my ring was slightly tighter when we first got engaged back in October, I never worried about it coming off. Ever.
Until now.
Recently, it seems looser, more twisty and generally more 'I-could-randomly-leap-off-your-finger-at-any-moment'.
I don't trust it. (Yep, the ring itself, trust Steve to get me one that is cheeky).
Due to Ms Sassy Pants Ring, I've been gradually more and more nervous about it, because it's obviously something I would be really upset about losing.
However I have found the solution!
Floss.
I tied floss snugly around my finger and popped the ring on top.I've been wearing it like that for more than a day and it works beautifully.
I doubt anyone has even noticed the floss.
Wednesday, 28 July 2010
Jewels
Several weeks ago, I was chatting with some friends about relationships and the like and, as is usual among friends, we each had colourful, true to us stories to bring to the table. When talking about Steve and I, I remarked that while he thought he'd found a catch at the time, he might have chosen differently had he known how crazy I'd turn out to be. And my friend, in a moment of ultimate wisdom, offered the following bit of brilliance:
"Every jewel has its price."
I've thought about that a lot since then, and the more I do, the more I realise how true it is. First of all, with Steve. If you've spent much time here at all, you know I'm pretty obsessed with my Boy. He is the personification of patience, humour, hard work, playfulness and level-headed wisdom, all rolled up in the body of a Greek god. I love him. But he tends to the insensitive side, tries to make me eat salad, and makes fun of me when I cry.
That's the price of the jewel. Totally willing to pay it.
The same analogy applies to so many other things: jobs, exercise, education, the list goes on. Nothing is perfect and nothing is free. You can have a good life, even a great life, but you have to be willing to pay its price.
Which brought me to the thing most occupying my time right now.
The wedding.
In preparation of the big day we are busting our guts all over the place.
But, at the end of the day, I reckon this particular jewel will be worth the price.
Or it bloody better be.
"Every jewel has its price."
I've thought about that a lot since then, and the more I do, the more I realise how true it is. First of all, with Steve. If you've spent much time here at all, you know I'm pretty obsessed with my Boy. He is the personification of patience, humour, hard work, playfulness and level-headed wisdom, all rolled up in the body of a Greek god. I love him. But he tends to the insensitive side, tries to make me eat salad, and makes fun of me when I cry.
That's the price of the jewel. Totally willing to pay it.
The same analogy applies to so many other things: jobs, exercise, education, the list goes on. Nothing is perfect and nothing is free. You can have a good life, even a great life, but you have to be willing to pay its price.
Which brought me to the thing most occupying my time right now.
The wedding.
In preparation of the big day we are busting our guts all over the place.
- Summer holiday - gone to save money and valuable holiday days
- Yummy, bad for you food - gone so I can be Ms Skinny on the wedding day (and therefore get back to normal in the year following the wedding rather than become a complete huffermoose)
- Lovely meals out - gone to save money for the wedding (which I suppose is ok as I can't eat anything from the menus due to the point directly above this one)
- Exercise - all the fricking time, if I have to do one more squat or lunge or sit up, I may scream
- Evenings - usually spent finding stockists of bridesmaid dresses or cake topper companies or arguing about how many menus we need (two per table or one for each person?)
But, at the end of the day, I reckon this particular jewel will be worth the price.
Or it bloody better be.
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