Saturday, 29 October 2011

Hoochy Livy...

Now, I am a bit of a hooch, I'll admit it.

And when recently Steve had the opportunity to get free JLS tickets, I was very excited. I mean, what would be better than me, a super hot 27 year old, going to a concert of four super hot 21 year olds?

And then I thought some more and came to a conclusion:

Steve: So, are we getting the tickets K*?

Me: No.

Steve: Why? They are free!

Me: It just won't end well. The only result is humiliation for you.

Steve: Do I want to know.... OK, why?

Me: Well, I will either sleep with one of them, especially the small one that does backflips or I will turn into a crazy old lady who gushes over them and makes a complete fool of herself. Either way it is bad for you.

There is a pause. Then...

Steve: And you think they would sleep with you because....

Me: I'm a tasty treat of course!

Tasty I tell you!
* Did I tell you that Steve called me K? I didn't? He does! x

Friday, 28 October 2011

If he could name all the animals

Steve came in today with one question:

"Why is a fly called a fly? I mean, other things fly don't they? Birds and stuff?"

While I pondered this philosophical quandary he continued:

"And for that matter why isn't there a Walk? Or a Swim? Or a Jump? Or a Drowned?"

At this point, feeling an epic rant coming on, I interjected,

"What would be a Drowned baby?"

Quick of a flash he responded,

"Something at the bottom of the sea of course! And there should be a Still! For like crustaceans that don't move and stuff! That is how all the animals should be named! I mean...."

Suddenly Rihanna came on the tv. Steve stops, he pauses, he stares, then,

"A little shouty Ri-Ri. Wow, I would make an excellent X Factor judge."

Monday, 24 October 2011


Bonjour, happy Monday evening! Today I have a post that I have been planning for a while. You see, the first week of September we got a call from Steve's Dad John saying that they had a little puppy, and there was a picture:

And his name was Monty.

Now Monty is possibly the cutest thing in the world and a few days later we got to meet him.

Sorry for the video overload but come on.... puppy! Also sorry for the hideousness that is my voice. Yuck.

Then we went away and came back and saw him again.

He had gotten a tad bigger, incidently on the same day my hair decided to do this bizarre big woohoo thing.

He is still cute though.

Monday, 17 October 2011

So.... healthy eating

that sucks.

It was around two minutes ago, approximately 32million hours after a delicious but minute dinner of stir fry, that Steve angrily decided to blame the television.

Steve: Why? Why are you showing me food adverts now? Is M&S open right now? No! No it is not! So what you have effectively done Comedy Central/M&S is get me all riled up over a cake that I can't have because YOU have decided to show an advert WHEN THE SHOP ISN'T OPEN! Well thank you very much.

Friday, 14 October 2011

And then he continued...

Yep, 20 minutes later he started again...

Steve: She came back a week later to ask what I liked about the chocolate!

Me: So really, very unlikely that she poisoned you with arsenic....

Steve: It probably was you know, like, a little bit, like a de-stimulant or something. Is that a word?

Me: ......

Steve: I mean, I can't even remember the name of the chocolate. That is probably why, because it was poisoned!

Me: OK....

Steve: Now I think about it, I get the hiccups a lot and I am very hairy!

Me: So...?

Steve: Michael isn't hairy at all! In fact, he is now bald! And I am unusually hairy!

Ten minutes pass.

Steve: It was the chocolate!

Thursday, 13 October 2011

He could have been a genius...

Steve had a flash back to his childhood tonight.

Steve: Liv, Liv! I just remembered something! Once, when I was little, some woman knocked on the front door and asked if I wanted to try some new chocolate bar and I asked my parents and they said yes!

Me: So....?

Steve: It could have been laced with arsenic!

Me: It obviously wasn't and, even if it was, then your parents would be with you and they would have seen the lady.

Steve: It probably had some secret poison. It is probably why I failed my GCSEs!!!!

Me: Right...

Steve: Michael across the street wasn't allowed it and he passed all of his. All As. Make of that what you will. I'm just saying.

My friend

This is Kaz.

Picture courtesy of Slice of Pie Designs

She is lovely. She works in publishing. She likes fashion. She loves ladybirds. She is creative. She is pretty. She is one of my best friends.

She is obviously the more sophisticated of the pair of us. Photo courtesy of Slice of Pie Designs

On Sunday she ran a half marathon in a fabulous time of two hours and seven minutes. That's great right?


It's insanely phenomenal.

Why? Because 19 months, three weeks and one day before that, she did this with us and broke her back. After a long stretch in hospital and having rods put into and then taken out of her back, she can now, not only walk and not only run, but run crazily well!

The rods and screws that were in her actual back. I know.

I am so, so , so proud of her. She has raised over £1000 for Spinal Research and, of course, the Fire Survivors were there to cheer her on every step of the way.

The four of us fantastic girls. Photo courtesy of Slice of Pie Designs

Beautiful October

So this has been my busiest month ever. Like ever.

October is always my favourite month, I love everything about it. There is something about the weather and the air that makes is just perfect. I get the tingles and, when I get the tingles, it must be special.

This month has been an adjustment. As I mentioned before, the Steve has started a degree course that is taking up two nights a week and I have started a sign language course (that rocks by the way, just wait for a super geeky post of that in the next few weeks) that is taking up another so that leaves us with a lot less time together than we are used to.

We are getting there but, remember Livy-the-Smut? Well she is returning, simply because of the lack of time to do a thing!

It is a bit of a struggle right now but it is, and will be, totally worth it. However... add in a hen do, a half marathon (not me but the amazing Kaz - again, more on that in the coming weeks), a house warming and a wedding and that makes for a busy Livy month.

But right now, it is Hull Fair time which means new gloves, churros, brandy snap and cinder toffee!

The bumpers. Me heart. And I took this picture on my actual phone!

Thursday, 6 October 2011


So I dropped a weight on my head.

Yep, you read that right.

As you know, I am a big fan of Ms Jillian Michaels, specifically her 30 Day Shread DVD. Me likey. It is what made me drop a dress size post fire and pre wedding. It is awesome.

So, last night, I got home and started the DVD, all was well until we came to the military presses. Now these are evil, you want to cry throughout them.

They look like this:

Except you balance on one leg when you do them for 'core strength'.

So I was unhappily doing the move when I somehow lost my balance and fell to the floor, dropping my weight on the way which then clunked on my head.

Now, my weights are filled with water so it made a delightful sloshing noise as it hit me, I momentarily worried it was my brain.