I paused, thinking of all the ick filled activities I seem to regularly engage in and, in a bid to make myself feel better, decided that they are PERFECTLY NORMAL and NOT AT ALL DISGUSTING and that EVERYONE DOES THEM ALL THE TIME.
So, I'm being brave, here is my Scummy Skanky list:
- When people are coming over I have been known to just pile all the gratuitous crap that clutters the flat into our bedroom and shut the door.
- I often clean the bath while I am having a shower, yep, shampoo in hair, scrubber in hand.
- I have on occasion pulled out a favourite top or cardigan from the washing basket and liberally febreezed it/sprayed it with perfume and then worn it.
- Unless something is spilt on them, my jeans do not get dirty at all. Honestly.
- I sometimes eat pesto straight out the tub with a spoon.
- Likewise tzatziki.
- Sometimes, on a Sunday, I just don't get dressed. I stay in my jammies and wear no makeup.
- I have been known to finish off the Chinese takeaway from the night before at 7am the next morning.
- I generally leave emptying the bin for as long as possible even if this means me pushing everything down really hard and forcing the lid shut.
- If it is a really yummy food like cheese and I drop a bit on the floor while chopping it, I often pick it up and eat it....
- If I wake up and can't be arsed to wash my hair and it looks a bit manky, I will just shove it back with a massive hair band thus covering the greasy bit.
- I don't hoover under anything that actually has to be moved to reach it unless ultimately necessary.
- I once used hair straighteners to de-crease my top as I couldn't be bothered to get the iron out.
- And my most shameful.... once I bought a new microwave because I exploded a tomato sauce in my old one and didn't want to clean it.
Oh and one that people have said is skanky but I maintain is actually genius: my lovely sister told me that she cuts her pizzas with scissors. And it works. It is absolutely amazing! I do it all the time now.
Big skanky love,